Bowled Road - by Christopher Trotter

Ruminations of an Ancient New Zealander

WILL LABOUR SURVIVE?

“It was a night of woe and dread,

When Michael in the tomb I laid!

Strange sounds along the chancel pass’d

The banners waved without a blast”-

Such weighty words, oh yay, those laden  lines, penned by Sir Walter Scott (1771-1832) when composing ‘The Lay of the Last Minstrel’, A Poem in Six Cantos, how heavy on my heart they measure today when I consider how the wondrous Michael Joseph Savage is analogous to their sentiment.

For yay I was present and correct, comrades, at that fateful conference, on that auspicious day, that seventh dawning of the seventh month of the year one thousand nine hundred and sixteen when oh mighty Party of Labour was born. Emerged, not blinking and mewling, but roaring and thrusting into the swathe of injustice, free and independent from other parties - Father Reform and Mother Liberal. Oh yes, oh yes, there had been elected Labour candidates from 1908, caucused under Hindmarsh. I sat in smoke-filled rooms and, as but a thin lad was as militant as the ‘Red Feds’, but finally we had the NEW ZEALAND LABOUR PARTY in 1916.

Wither now that august body? 

For whom now doth the bell toll? Whence the memories of the greatest names ever spake in our House of Representatives – Fraser, Lee, Holland, Nash (No, not Stuart), Nordmeyer, Kirk, Rowling, ,. (What about the wimmin - Ed?).

Names I conjure with when I stride like a colossus among the pigmies of political commentary. For others are but dross, casting their epithets and naming words upon the screens and pages like withered autumn leaves blowing under the rolling wheels of autos on gridlocked motorways of life. (Oh do get on with it - Ed)

Will Labour survive I ponder, as I rub my chin thoughtfully, trying to stop myself losing my temper on Radio Live with Rodney Hide of a Monday morning with that retread radio host Sean Plunket? I recall the waterfront conflict of 1913, when we the unskilled and pacifists were locked out and truly felt excluded, but Labour were relevant then as they’ve never been since. (No they weren’t, they lost their next election - Ed).

But as the late, great, wondrous Bruce Jesson (RIP) often said, Labour was the mighty beast because it garnered  support (as I have exclusively spoken) from those excluded from society, those such as industrialist James Fletcher, who could lobby Ministers – Coates, Fraser, Nash. Fletcher founded a dynasty but yet he was a humble man who eschewed wallpaper and coated his walls with exclusive New Zealand works of art.

Fintan Patrick Walsh – ah there was a master lobbyist! Courageous as Braveheart – “Alba gu brath” except he would be meaning Workers for Ever as he stormed up those steps of Parliament. Give me compulsion and regulation or give me death. Where would Labour’s support have languished, flopped and gasped as a fish beached on the mudflats when the tide of voters have gone out on a hot Bay of Islands summer afternoon, where would the members have been without this vice-president then president of the Federation of Labour’s close relationship with Peter Fraser – in the interests of industrial harmony of course (Bollinger, 1968) and the union movement achieving compulsory unionism. Those indeed were the days of wine and clover, beer and sausage rolls, shandy and Maggi & Nestle reduced cream dips for the ladies in the kitchen.

So brothers, sisters, let us join together and sing one last ballad for our comrades – the men, the wimmin, the GLTGSSWYLTCIB* - in the Parliamentary wing as they go down fighting over the leadership.

“I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night,

Alive as you or me

Says I, "But Joe, you're ten years dead,"

"I never died," says he.

"I never died," says he.

And standing there as big as life

And smiling with his eyes

Says Joe, "What they forgot to kill

Went on to organize,

Went on to organize."

*Gay Lesbian TransGender Same Sex Whatever You Like To Call It Brigade

Editor - Chris Trotter is a weekly political columnist and commentator appearing it seems almost everywhere daily. On occasion he's also been known to sing.  In fact he is very good at singing. Lord knows why he doesn't sing his columns.  They may get a better cut through. According to his Wikipedia, in February 2008 Trotter said that Helen Clark should stand down before the election and be replaced by Phil Goff, who Trotter thought may have been Labour's only hope of regaining ground with struggling families. He has since recanted, arguing that Goff should have stood down in his turn before the New Zealand general election, 2011, arguing that David Cunliffe should replace him. Known by The Standard bloggers as an instant hex, he supported David Shearer for the Labour leadership, Andrew Little and is now rumoured to be excited about the prospect of Jacinda Ardern leading the party faithful.  Ardern is less excited at this enthusiasm. Trotter can be found telling stories in union pubs where he will freely admit after a cleansing ale that he hasn't got a bloody clue and  just makes this stuff up like everyone else does in politics.

How on earth did this column not win a Canon Award?